Failure to prioritize

I'm sure you've heard about the Chinese bride who fled her wedding day to interview locals about a 7.0-magnitude earthquake.

According to globalpost.com, whether she was getting her makeup done or walked out on the actual nuptials is disputed. As a former bride and wedding photographer, however, I can tell you that by the time the veil is positioned on the bride's head, preparation is completely done and she's ready to walk down the aisle. Regardless of whether or not she made a dramatic exit, she's practically being acclaimed a heroin.

This woman abandoned the most important person in her life on the most important day of their lives, and her act is being appraised as dedication. 

How about textbook irony? 

Had this been her quinceanera, I would have no doubt offered my applause, with little to no consideration for the shrugging teenage guests and half-wacked pinata (so I know they don't do pinatas at quinceaneras... but let's go with it for the sake of impressing informality). But this was her wedding day. On the day that she stands before God to proclaim her utmost loyalty to a man she'll promise to forsake all others for, he's left standing alone---in the name of interviewing eye-witnesses regarding a non-time sensitive event.

Let's keep things in perspective. She's not a medic---she's a news anchor. A fly to a wound, but less essential. Journalists flock to areas of natural disaster to bother people with microphones so that other people can sit at home on their couch and shake their heads with unintelligent expressions on their face while listening to bewildered eye-witness accounts and "I-didn't-know-what-was-happening"-type responses. If their media is anything like ours, this will probably go on for one week at an absolute minimum.

And yet, this was an emergency. No one, not anyone, could have replaced her. What a hero.

In the comments of one article, one person aggressively mused that any other action would have been pure selfishness. Believe it or not, this thought process appears to be the norm. But there's one small problem with pretending like this was a mere birthday party: she was a bride---which means there was a groom.

Yes! Despite how much the wedding industry has grown while the rate of successful marriages have not, the little shin-dig we call a wedding day involves more than just the bride and is supposed to mean something. For anyone to suggest that the bride ditching her groom at the altar to fill a position for which she was entirely replaceable and involved a non-life threatening emergency was not only selfless but unquestionably justifiable... well, that's just indicative of society's joke called marriage in the twenty-first century. The very thought of revering such a sad act makes me shudder in disgust.

Many view the whole situation as trivial, even comical. But such a response should serve as a reminder of our nation's lack of deliberately established priorities. It is why families, the very structure of our nation, are falling apart at the seams. I personally would not have been interviewing passer-by's that day; I would have been at my groom's side. And yet, we laugh. We applaud. Meaning has become a punchline; those who maintain priorities are not tolerated by those who preach tolerance.

Let's be intentional about our priorities and stand by them. Do not ever apologize for them. And pray for those who trivialize that which is so indicative of a broken people.

Thanks for reading  & happy Thursday! :)

A margined life

Time. It's the one thing in the world of which we share an equal amount every day. The one currency in which we're neither rich or poor. The intangible value that ever escapes us. Some of us have been blessed with the prerogative to manage it to our liking more than most. At this point in my life, I'm fortunate to be able to. Although I consider it a great responsibility, I will never take for granted the priviledge I currently possess of managing and using my time at my own discretion. And yet somehow, I still find myself pressed for time.

I doubt I'm the only person who suffers from this self-inflicted syndrome. I know I have no one to blame but myself. For example: if it's 5:30am and I have somewhere to be in three hours, I really and truly believe that I have enough time to squeeze in a workout (1hr 20 minutes), take a shower (30 minutes), scarf breakfast (who wants to scarf breakfast?!), find something to wear, walk the dog, do my hair and makeup (let's just say it takes more than an hour, mk), and leave room for driving time (average is 30 minutes in Texas) plus traffic (at least 10, although I never do). This is how I live my life. BEST possible case scenario? I'm not late to where I'm going, I arrive alive and hopefully speeding ticket free, and my life goes by way faster than it needs to.

In short, I'm learning the value of margin.

Margin is defined as an edge or a border. In a Word document, it's the extra inch on every side. In life, it's the space that allows room to breathe. It's the brink that makes all the difference between falling off a cliff and standing on it. It permits for inevitable hiccups and valuable reflection. It decreases the stress in our lives and improves the quality. It's smelling the roses. To deny yourself the option of doing so is decidedly no way to live.

I'm by no means a fatalist. I'm a firm believer that our lives are direct outcomes of the choices we make, and that if we aren't proud or happy with our life, we can only do something by taking it up with the one person who has the power to change it (ourselves). But as someone with a personality which has a tendency to control, I've had to accept there's few things I have direct influence over in my daily life.

One is my reactions. The other is my time.

So today, I traded a workout and makeup for an extra hour of needed sleep, which I considered an investment not only for the day but for the rest of the week. I watched the Olympics for a record time of five whole minutes while I ate my breakfast. I had time to brew water for tea before I headed out the door. I arrived where I was going on time. It may not sound like THE LIFE, but if the present is the only life we have, then I improved the quality of it in the capacity that I was able to. And what a better life it is.


Makeup free but happy.